I don't know what to do anymore?

I'm in love with a man who insists he loves me but is not in love with me. He says he wants to hold off on for a bit saying that things got too complicated because of it but just today and most days he kisses me hello goodbye and several times in between. I stay at his house and he just holds me tight all night and when I move away from him he takes it personally. We text all day, either arguing or writing poetry back and forth or just talking. He always gives me updates on what he's up to and I see him every other day at least and i spend the night at his house at least twice a week. While we where seeing eachother he told everyone we wheren't in a relationship, but after I left he called me crying to get me to come back around and later explained that he tried very hard at our relationship. (that we where never in?) about once every two weeks he "Dumps" me, even though we aren't in a relationship. sometimes I don't exist to him even when I'm in the room, and sometimes I'm the center of the universe no matter where I am. I'm some sort of masochist i guess, because I let him sucker me back in after every I don't know what to do anymore-love you but I'm not in love-i still want to be friends-doesn't my friendship mean anything to you-kick through the drywall-makeout-crazy session we have. Damn pretty eyes. Am I a stupid girl? am i being lead on? what kind of b ackwards honesty is this? We've been on an emotional rollercoaster for six months, and it's driving me mad.